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Embracing the Steve Smith in Us

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I felt the same intense anger that cricket fans all over felt when I learnt about the ball tampering incident. After the “brain fade” in India, Steve Smith did not leave much love on the table. We always knew he was not the most honest guy around. And then on Thursday, he broke down at the Press conference. Those tears were real. One felt sorry. Which Steve Smith is the real Steve Smith- the one who cheated or the one who cried and repented? Both. In my last blog I wrote about how narrow definitions of growth confine and stifle us into spaces that we don’t necessarily enjoy but end up being in. While doing so we suppress and submerge those parts of ourselves which are truly ourselves- our core selves which make us feel truly alive. Steve Smith was probably caught in such a place- the part of him that wanted success at all costs and could not take failure was dominant and active. Infact it was the dominant part that put on Whites and walked on to the field. This was the part

What does growth mean?

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Have been in a few conversations recently where career growth, progression etc. have been the hot topic of discussion. Realized at the end of it that we as a society have started to place too much value and hence focus on external validation of growth. Titular growth, accompanied by material markers of success seem to be inextricably linked to conventional definitions of growth. This is leading to conflict because two distinct individuals might want to grow towards the same title, and more importantly and sadly it is taking away from a more individualistic model of growth which is anchored in individual identity as a starting point.  Needless to say, for the latter to take place, individuals need to take charge of their own growth and development. What does this look like (or not)? Let’s first start with a rudimentary definition of growth which I lay no claim to on authorship but identify very strongly with Individual Growth=  “Being a better version of oneself” W

Our Inner Voice

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“Man is born free but everywhere he is in chains”- Jean Jacques Rousseau, “The Social Contract” In the book Man’s search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl talks about how you can take everything away from a man but hope. Confined to a concentration camp by the Nazis, seeing death and distress around him every day, Viktor Frankl managed to get in touch with something deep within himself that helped him cope with the fear and suffering that was all around him. Mind you there was much to fear- Fear of death, fear of torture, fear that he will never be able to see his beloved wife who was in a similar camp elsewhere. Viktor Frankl managed to outlive the concentration camp, become a famous psychologist and author, while many of his friends and colleagues at the concentration camps died, even before they were gassed by the Nazis. How did Viktor Frankl survive? He did not lose hope. He found meaning within the fearful existence of a concentration camp. He says in his book “Everything

Self Compassion- a dialogue with oneself

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It’s exam season. Everyone around seems tense, there seems to be so much at stake, for children and more so for parents. One feels sad and pitiful. It could be so different. I was fortunate to be raised by parents who for some reason did not pressure me ever over academics. I do not recall any instance of an altercation with either my mother or my father over studying, how many marks I got, why did I lose marks carelessly etc. In retrospect, maybe this is why for me, the process of learning has been an enjoyable one. I do not feel nervous around it or hate it; in fact I look forward to the intellectual stimulation that comes with it. Those of you who know me will also know that I didn’t do too badly at academics in school and college (Engg being a different story altogether though!) When I reflect back now, with some grey hair, and a better understanding of human behaviour, I realize that there was something that my parents did then which was quite right. They balanced respon