Budget Deficit


Ah the budget, gets blockbuster status even though the guy in the lead role has remained the same for the last four years…he wears a loin cloth that inspired India when wrapped around some other thinner legs half a century ago but now is a symbol of a conservative south….PC wears a Harvard accent on a Chidambaram surname. He wears a progressive veil on a Pandi bandwagon.

After that rather controversial beginning (sorry that one didn’t end in the previous paragraph), let me begin. My biggest problem with the budget, well a big problem that I have with the budget, or let me just say…well should I just not say. What the hell!!!!
It’s the jargon, men! (as my petite East Indian receptionist might tell you).

What’s a fiscal deficit, is it what we generally call being kangaal. Imagine the street corner beggar go “Sir can you contribute to reducing my fiscal deficit” (A certain World Bank does hear that from us, maybe used to). Or for that matter what the hell is capital ACOUNT CONVERTIBILITY. Does it mean something that’s got to do with potential religious mass conversions in Delhi. Maybe there also is non-capital account convertibility (this one is not in caps…. for the dunce heads).
Tax and its various avatars. Can’t PC take my money away in one stroke, by just calling it one name! Why call it different names for Godssake What’s a cess….sounds like mess or even like a bad wound.And if he levies that cess time and again will he call it re-cess? Related and equally sad I guess is the word surcharge. It’s the icing on the take, the chillar on the note. Fringe benefit tax (FBT)-scrounging for that last penny that you made on the ESOP. It describes taxing what you get on the side, like it’s the only money on the side that anybody ever made or will ever make. PC wants to make the most of it right now, what if the fringe benefits becomes part of Income (he’ll then probably call it FBTHNBPOIT (Fringe benefit that has now become part of Income….tax). Then of course there is the OPD (Oil Pool Deficit). My hypothesis is that OPD happens when a bunch of mallus decide to up their coconut oil usage or is it something that’s got to do with what happens to pools around the country when there’s an Oil tanker disaster.
Coming soon FEMA, SME, CENVAT, VAT, BCTT,
QBKDW, NVDVS, BQIBIQ……AAARGH!!!!!!!!!!!

Comments

Abhishek said…
Seriously...jargon-damagement reaches its peak in the budget season...I, unfortunately, understand a bit of it and have got tired of explaining people around me about it....

PC - please simplify!
March 09, 2007 4:20 pm
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